A third culture kid (TCK) is what I became while in Asia. Returning to the USA was hard because as a TCK, I belonged to neither the Asian nor American culture. I was some mix of the two, and I felt out of place back in my “home” country. And to be honest, I didn’t even feel like I quite fit in with the other TCKs since I had such a hard adjustment to Asia with the language and food. Many of my friends changed countries at a much younger age and so they were fairly fluent in the new language and loved the food. And I disliked haggling over prices, which was normal fair for getting around and shopping.
However, being in Asia still felt more comfortable to me than being in the USA. I was afraid of telephones, answering machines, cashiers and toll booths. I went to a re-entry program to help MKs adjust better from overseas, and I learned about the racial tensions in the US. It confused and scared me, and I didn’t understand why there was animosity since I grew up among another race. In looking towards my future, I wanted to be anywhere but in the overwhelming USA.
So I eventually started praying about applying to go back into missions. I was asking God if this is what I should do with my life and told Him that I’d go anywhere in the world (even Russia!). But please don’t make me stay in the US. (Russia was the opposite weather preference for me after growing up in the tropics. I did get to briefly go to Russia down the road, but that’s another story…..)
God very clearly told me no. I was so disappointed. Wasn’t staying in the comfortable USA a cop out? I grew up hearing that message and that we were supposed to go to the ends of the earth for Him. But He told me to stay where I wasn’t comfortable, and I wasn’t very happy about it.
But God is so wise. He knew who He made me to be and what would be necessary to make me more whole. Hiding in overseas ministry was not going to benefit my spiritual growth in the long run. I would have tried to find my sense of belonging in that instead of in a loving relationship with God Himself. He graciously arranged my life in the uncomfortable USA to show me who I am and who He is.